There, I feel better already.
Today is a Mawmaw is driving me insane day.
Anytime I do anything she'd never consider doing (which is pretty much ANYTHING) I get to hear a completely made up cautionary story trying to talk me out of it. Most of the time they are spread out enough I don't want to scream, but these have all been in the last three days:
She can't believe I mow our yard. She knows someone who cut their foot open with a push mower like that. Her other version of this is that she knew someone who killed someone else by a rock coming out of the mower and hitting them in the head. Never mind the fact that we never have anyone outside when we mow..she still tells the story. If you ask who it was she either says she can't remember their name or she stammers and hem haws and then makes one up on the spot. Tell her it's a different one from the last time she told that story and watch her get mad.
She can't believe I use a weed eater. She knows someone who cut their ankle open using one.
She can't believe we keep gas in a gas can. She knew someone who kept some in their garage and it blew up.
She can't believe I use a pressure canner. She knew someone who was using one and it blew up.
She can't believe I ferment cabbage to make sauerkraut. She knew someone who did and it blew up.
(see a theme here?)
She can't believe I rewire electrical switches, she knew someone who did and electrocuted themselves.
She can't believe I cut up meat, she knew someone who cut their finger off.
About two minutes ago she was staring at me while I'm working on the baby blankets and told me she can't believe I use a sewing machine, she knew someone who sewed right through their finger!
I think she 'knew' a lot of accident prone idiots, huh?!?!?!